Most of us unconsciously see intimacy as universal and accessible to everyone.
We have built cultural narratives around the idea that love, acceptance, and even touch are naturally occurring resources. Things that just magically appear if you are “a good person” or in a relationship with the right person.
But that’s not how the world works.
Intimacy is not evenly distributed. Or readily available to all who seek it.
Sure, some people move through life with easy access to love, sex, and warmth. They are fortunate enough to have their desires understood, bodies validated, and to love in socially acceptable ways.
And then there are the people on the fringe.
Folks who are surrounded by humans but rarely feel seen. Those with stigmatized desires and “weird” proclivities. Lonely individuals who yearn for the warmth of human contact but have zero desire for the complications of a full-scale relationship.
But society doesn’t really make room for these kinds of variables.
Unmet needs are treated like moral defects or personal deficits. People who don’t fit neatly into the social construct are expected to swallow their longings, suck it up, and endure in isolation.
These are the things that conversations about sex work rarely address. The nuance.
If we were to strip away the knee-jerk shame and judgment and look at consensual adult sex work through an honest lens, we might see it as a social service.
Not that it solves every problem. And it obviously doesn’t replace the messy glory of traditional relationships. But many times, sex work acknowledges that human connection is far more complex than our cultural fairy tales admit.
We do struggle to talk about hard things, right?
And our views on sex work are complex, mostly because our relationship with sex is enmeshed with religion, politics, and a desperate desire for acceptance.
It’s a lot.
In this week’s episode, we are talking about sex work and how it might be a social service that benefits the collective and the few.
Listen here (up there 👆🏾) or wherever you get your podcasts.
If this resonated with you, share the link with a friend
or, even better, with your partner.
